Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
