i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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