your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
