This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
