I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Sext me about skeletons
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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