was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
