You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize