didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
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