She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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