At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
