I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Randomize
