Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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