normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
