I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
There was a lot of him and a little penis
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
