I just pynch a tree in the face
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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