It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
It's just like the Real World with babies
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
