We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
