No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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