Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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