I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Randomize
