The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
