i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
So vagazzling was a success
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
