Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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