I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
false alarm. still invincible.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
