Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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