Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
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Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
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So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
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