we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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