yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
