WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
