'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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