My pussy is not your playground.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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