One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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