Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
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