I cannot find my penis.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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