I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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