I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
