you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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