I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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