I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
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