Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Randomize
