I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i dont even know how to be here
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
