There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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