Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Randomize
