Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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