Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize