I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
