he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize