Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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