Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
So vagazzling was a success
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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