her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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