Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
